Misery Diets Contd

************Day 18 ***************

Ok i am writting this a day late as had a busy busy day, so busy infact....i didnt eat at all!! woooohooo, just going to be a short tale as got to do todays too!!Work was ok, lots of people off , quiet, then off to a charity do for a friends mum. Quiz night,,,,,,ok so first round is history....which isnt my strong point....but 7 out of 10 aint bad woooohoooom, then science.....arse!! again 7 out of 10 woooooohoooo, but i did tell them that carbon was the right element, as tunston had a lower boiling temp/melting point...cant remember the exact question....but would they listen ffs!!! ohh well, we were well ahead to start with...but then i caught a glimpse of a huge fat girl!! no it isnt large lycra girl....it is a big fat ugly hefer that my ex went home with and thinks he chucked one up, when he was drunk!!! and yes he was still with me, the sh1tbag!! no i am not being cruel just truthful, this girl is at least 30 stone!!! with a face like a bag of fire damaged lego!!! Now what ex doesnt know is he naver actually shagged her, cos he wouldnt get undressed cos her house was covered in dog sh1t, so you get the picture....she isnt toooo classy!! quite a contrast from my Janet raeger sheets and remarkably smaller carcass!! needless to say i was devastated when i found out, we had been together 3 years, and i had been told that day i had cancer....so i felt slightly let down.....and i know he didnt actually do it, but he thinks he did, and the fact he went back with a skip rat like that shows how little he thought of me!!! So needless to say my mind wasnt on the quiz after that grrrrr !!Got home with a bad head ache and went to bed :)
Calories 0
Kisses 0
Munters spotted 1
Jokes cracked about munter 1653
xx

***********DAY 17 ******************

Well a different type of tale today, but normal broadcast will continue tomorrow.Today was a stressful day from the offset, as i was finding out if i got my own job or not!!So today is first NONE DIET DAY!!SOoooo taking full advantage of the lack of salad and nasty yogurt drinks....i started off my fat arse wednesday by drowning my potential sorrows in a costa latte and a Mcsausage and egg muffin Mcness!! tasted pretty pants so binned half of it lol!! and off i went to work to await 10.30 and see if i got a job or not!! but by 9am i was in the toilet chucking up my breakfast...not through nerves, as i dont suffer from them as a rule, but from too much fat in my stomache i think!! so after my Mcvomitting i felt much better :)I wasnt bothered about the job situation, as i dont believe in stressing about the things you can not change, and my ethos to life is....well no one died and no one got cancer....so nothing is that bad!! The letters arrived at 11am...in typical civil servant style...nothing is on time...but i was down having a fag at the time, so i came back to my section to the scene of devastation that was the 2 other girls who had opened the letters and not got a job!! ffs.....so i opened mine...and yadda yadda happy to offer you a permenant job blah blah !! so i did it, i blagged it, i got a proper job lol!! Now we had to take some mental online tests to get these jobs, and i feel bad, as i just ticked boxes randomly and didnt read the questions....luck of the blarney stone or what!!!!So i had to sit for the rest of the day with people crying and being major league upset, as hardly anyone got their own jobs!!!So i was glad when 3.30 came round and i could leave, i felt bad all day, having to watch my friends and people who are very capable of doing their jobs. Madness!!So i didnt go to the gym, but did jump on a sun bed again...and now i am home...and i have be bought so have a new owner!

Calories - who cares
Kisses - a few but mainly from friends cos i got my job
Jobs secured - 1
xx

**************** DAY 16 *****************

Didnt wake up early, as didnt go to bed!!...mainly because i fell asleep early last night then woke up about midnight, and couldnt get back to sleep ffs!!!!So i did make my free parking space wooohooo, another 4 quid for moi!!I walked a different route today to work, for 2 reasons...i am still wondering where my lycra leggings are!! and i am sure some one is sporting them somewhere, and because i have to walk under 2 subways to get to work the normal way...and it has been so windy it turns them into wind tunnels, and i didnt fancy being blown over!!But no leggings and no arse over tit due to wind...so not bad in the big scheme of things!!!So breakfast was a yogurt again, but i ran out of cherry flavour, so had to go for fruits of the forest...now i live near forests...and not seen have of the fruits in that tub in a forest yet!!Lets just say every spoonful made me shudder!!!Not much happened at work...but tomorrow will be judgement day...as 148 of us find out if we have been given a permenant job or not, so we all had to apply for our OWN jobs!! but there is only about 60 jobs up for grabs!!! hmmmmm now i am no booky but i reckon i stand about a snowballs chance in hell!! Anyone want to offer me a job, i have a huge variety of skills, office, retail, poledancer, interpreter, genral dogs body, sex slave...anything really lol!!.I didnt bother packing lunch....so had a bacon and lentil soup and it was lovely,wooohooo!!I could hardly keep my eyes open by 12.30 so thought i would have coffee! now this is a bad move for me, as i hardly ever drink it, so it sends me a bit frisky...so after my second cup i was ready to take on the world lol....after a few minutes, i started to have heart palputations!!and a desire to do the wall of death around the office on my wheelie chair!!, so i decided i better leave work, so left at 3...hmmm thats 30 mins on to my flexi!!oh well i can sort it out tomorrow...hmmmm, i am 12 hours 3 minutes in debt, so need to do something!!I was on my way to the gym, but passed the sun bed place so opted for a sunbed instead lol....hmmmm not in the right frame of for the gym hee hee.Got home and had a bacon buttie!!hmmmmm i am gonna have to do a bit more effort tomorrow lol!!xx


******************** DAY 15 **************************

Wake up at 6.45, forgot to make lunch last night due to many hassles from crazy ex! So i throw some lettuce and tomatoes into a box, and grab 2 ryvitas and a yogurt out of the cupboard.Make it to my free parking space, and head up to work :)....ahhh its good to be back ..NOT.I have my yougurt at about 9am, as i am still not feeling that hungry...and then get down to work.Lunchtime is dire, i clearly havent brought enough food, hmmm more speed last haste i guess!! So i eat my rabbit food and head off to the gym!!!Hmmm seems someone has missed me at the gym....tall gorgeous guy says "long time no see"...and has a geordie accent ( i think to myself BONUS)!!! i have a bit of a pet thing about the geordie accent, now lets hope he wears glasses too...again another one of my things...men in glasses...when i become ruler of the world, it will be the first law i pass, ALL men must wear glasses!! even if they dont need them.lol!!Large lycra girl isnt there, hmmm maybe she has reached her targer weight....25 stone lol...oooh what a cow i am ...tut.Now then SSW is there, and she runs up to me, ohhh where have you been, i explain, and she replies, "i have missed you"....hmmmm odd, not even my mum would have missed me after a week of not seeing me, she suggest that we swap mobile numbers incase i am AWOL again...i reply "ermmm yeah sure but i dont know mine, and i havent got my phone on me" ....praying to god that no one calls or texts me!! or i am busted!!!!I do my routine, and she follows me into changing room, chatting about i am looking great, and my figure is getting nicely toned!! hmmmm for you guys out there that said she wants in my pants, i am now thinking you may have a point, she comments on my bum, being lovely and pert TWICE ...WTF!!....now she might just be a nice kinda person, but you lot have made me paranoid. I get changed, and leave the cubucicle, and she is there, will her number on a piece of paper!! hmmm i take it and lie and say i have no credit! Now what am i gonna do!!! Back to work until 3.30, then i decide i am off for a sunbed, as i am looking whiter than white, well for me anyway!! My usual salon is closed, so i go to a diff one, and their beds are like a tardis, they talk to you and spray you with "stuff" hmmm i will be back i think.Then home and a quick shower, a weight watchers chicken curry, which by the way wasnt too bad, and then on the scales.I have lost another 4lbs this week, not as good as last week, but i hadnt been to the gym at all, with being ill!! so well done me.I go out to meet my friends, who have all met for dinner, hmmm theres looks devine, as i sit sipping a water *sigh*, we gossip, and rip the micky out of some poor unfortunate bloke who keeps looking over at us!! Lou pipes up that i must be "that" desperate by now.....cheeky mare!! tut and tut again. I nip to the loo, return and my friends are laughing...hmmm at me?....we leave, and low and behold i am told that my mobile number has been written on a napkin and handed to bloke!! ffs!!! after a good hour wind up, they tell me the truth, they gave out their exes number to him ....oops lol,now i can see the funny side lol.Tried to find the icerink number today, but no joy, i will take a drive up at the weekend i think!!!

Calories 780
Phone number incidents 2
Kisses 0
Time on scales 1
Weight loss 4 lbs
xx

******************** DAY 14 *********************

Well it is sunday, and i am still not feeling in top form, but at last finally feel like i am on the mend thank goodness.Got woken up by a call from big gay Dave, asking what time we were going to tesco, now...for those girls out there who dont have a gay best friend...GET ONE!!They have all the advantage of a boyfriend, BUT...they love shopping, treat you like a princess, will carry heavy things, and they never want into your pants....well apart from a scissor sisters concert....hmmm ...cups hands and shouts...DAVE CAN I PLEASE HAVE MY LEATHER HOT PANTS BACK ....ewwwww!! lol.So went shopping with my tesco club card vouchers £36 worth....cool.....and to top the morning off, my activia yogs are on half price....RESULT....see if i had gone to church i would have missed all this lol!!I still have no appetite at all. So havent actually eaten yet today, maybe later! Havent done anything else today, but i have been on the scales, and i appear to have gained 1lb !! ermmm HOW!!! god dammit, i have still lost for the week, but cant reveal how much until tomoz!! hee hee.

Calories 0
Kisses 0
Choc Fantasies 0Hmmmm i feel like Croatia in the eurovision song contest with scores like that lol
xx

*********************Day 13**********************

Still ill so not gonna be a long tale tonight, i have 2 days until my official weigh in, but as i am totally obsessed with getting on the scales, i already know i have done well again this week, well ....well considering i have had a failing kidney, and not been able to get to the gym, or infact leave the house!!! so roll on monday, when i actually announce the loss!! i am surprised i have lost anything to be honest, as only been able to go on my lateral thigh trainer a couple of times and only for 500 reps each time, just in too much pain :(So today i have been in the house all day, i was meant to go out tonight, but got out the shower, and just felt dreadful, so cancelled and stayed in :)....see i am sensible some times!!!i havent really eaten today, i seem to have lost my appetite to be honest!! so just a yogurt, and some soup...hmmm really not enough i know!!Going to tesco tomorrow so will buy lots of lovely stuff that will get me interested lol!!

Calories 138
kisses 0
times on scales 32!!

******************* DAY 12********************

I didnt get much sleep last night, and for all the wrong reasons...no hot streamy session, just a really sore kidney!! grrrrr.So i didnt get up until 10am, obviously no work today after what happened yesterday!So i had a yogurt....slimey yet satisfying (from the lion king btw).Then went back to bed!! But by Jeremy Kyle time i was feeling alot better, ahhh the delights of a stay at home woman!! that show is addictive, almost as much as ryvita in my opinion.!!So i watched in horror, as people sat there and lied to their "loved ones" only to be public humiliated when the lie detector results came back!! now surely...even if you do have the worlds worst hair cut and not a full compliment of teeth, you have enough sense to sit there and lie, knowing you have done a test ffs, is just plain stupid!! hmm clearly not i guess.Did make me feel better about my own life though, at least i just found out about my dirty cheating weasle of an ex the traditional way!! At smokers corner at work!!! hmmm actually that was pretty humiliating too, ahhh happy days lol!!So i decide as i am looking after my god son tonight i will prepare dinner and take it with me, as i dont really have an appetite at the moment, so i boil rice, which turned into a stodge, so read the packet, scrubbed pan and tried again!! Result, chopped up somne veg and popped it all in a platic box, the lid wasnt the best fitting but it is only a 10 minute drive so all would be fine.Traffic was hellish, so i turned up the cd player and waved at the kids that pointed at my flowery car hee hee!!Sitting in slow moving traffic and WHAMMMMMMMMM some numbpty in a penis extension for a car has driven into the back off me!! ffs. But worse than that, my box of rice has flown of the passenger seat and is now all over the passenger side, and windscreen, after a small altercation, and telling him too fook off, when he wanted to know if i fancied a drink, i got his insurance details, and went on my way.Made it in time and checked car properly, no damage that i can see so i assume all is well. but my god that rice in the car stinks!!! hmmmmm!So no dinner today ffs, thanks to Aryton Senna and his lapse of concentration, so today all i have had is a yougurt ffs!!Oh well it will make up for not going to the gym :)

So calories 71
Times on scales 34 <--- i was feeling better
Kisses 0
Banged from behind 1

****************** Day 11 ********************

Ok back to work today. So up nice and early, remembered to brush hair, and spray choc lynx....left the house, half way to work and forgot to take anti biotic...turned around ...back home took tablet and back on the road again!!....made my free parking space ..OHHHH YEAH!!I had a yougurt for breakfast, half hoping that the friendly bacteria will sort out my kidney...well i dont know how these things work...hmmm wonder if my anti biotics will have some strange reaction with them, and i could explode....like the marshmallow man on ghost busters lol....hmmm maybe i need another type of medication!!All is going well at work and i got caught up with all the emails and stuff to do went for some training, but god my back is hurting cos of this kidney malarky, hurts if i stand...hurts if i sit!! dont know if i need a shit or a haircut by 10.30!!! so lets just say, i took a turn for the worse and was sent home!!Now due to feeling rather faint and unsteady, i decide to put my ham salad between 2 slices of bread and have a sandwich for lunch! probably need carbs!! so there is a few hundred calories i could have done without, but probably for the best!! Followed by a bowl of crunchy nut cornflakes, for the sugar...yummy!!After that i just crashed on the sofa all day, feeling sorry for myself lol!!! but feeling more chipper now, but worried that it has been 5 days since the gym...but have deicded to leave that until next week....wonder what SSW has been up to lol!!. Also secretly hoping that large lycra woman, has been advised that lycra is not a good look for her...i mean skin tight is ok on namomi campbell, but skin tight on jo brand with huge knickers underneath ewwwww, i mean visual panty line honey lol....wear a thong for heavens sake!! i believe evans do them right up to a size "hampshire" so surely she can afford 4 quid for them!!So all in all not the best day.

Calories - roughly 700
fainting episodes - 1
Time on scales – 4