Valentines Day...Day 4 of diet!!

So i wake up early again, brush hair, and make it to one of the free parking spaces again, so that is another £4.00 in my sky rocket.

I walk a different route to work today to see if i can catch sight of my pink leggings poking out from a make shift home, or from under a newspaper, but no joy!

Breakfast is once again an actimel and probiotic zero fat yougurt..what they fail to tell you it is also zero taste....now considering i have been giving my body friendly bacteria every day for 4 days now, i am not feeling too friendly...hmmm i just woke up in a bad mood which isnt like me at all.....then the penny drops OHH MY GOD it is smug beautiful girl day...also known as Valentines day...so i am going to be sat in a building with 400 people who are getting called to reception to collect flowers, and have my day filled with tales of what they are going to be doing with their "Mr Fabulous"...oooh i can hardly wait.

I am going to campaign for fat ugly bird day so at least one day a year, i can get showered in gifts and flowers lol, i will pop that on my "to do" list along with cutting the lawn,paying the dentist and finding that clear removable bra strap i have lost. Hmmm i wonder where that is actually?

So today my breakfast has filled me up until....7.37 so this is more progress, either my stomach is shrinking or it has just given up hoping for a MacDonalds sausage and egg muffin!!So i settle down to work and at 09.01 i get a call to go to reception...so i take the stairs, and assume it is a sick joke or a customer who is annoyed at me for some reason..but NO!!
It is a bunch of flowers for MOI!!!!????!!!!...i am hoping they are not fromt he sleezy big guy who works in the building across the road, as he has a personal hygiene problem, yellow teeth and over active grease glands...but was it coincidence that he was having a fag as my flowers got delivered....i hope so!!
So i take the flowers and walk back up the 4 flights of stairs, but the extra weight of flowers is killing me, and i make it to the 4th floor, red faced and out of breath, i sound like an 85 year old miner who has smoked 60 a day for life...i place flowers on desk, and sit down..ohh yes i am OFFICIALLY the first girl to get flowers in the building today...and the frist girl to nearly die of a heart attack too!!

9.30.....i am relieved to notice my heart rate has returned to normal and that my wheezing is no longer audible at the other end of the office, ohhh and i am feeling much friendlier now too, i dont think it has much to do with the digestifus bipolar emunitas bacteria thingies in my morning drink, i think it could be the flowers, just a hunch!

Lunch time comes round really quickly Hurrah, but my salad looks grim today, i consider eating some foliage from my bouquet but the risk of poisoning deters me just in time, and i settle for a rather limp lettuce tomato and cucumber box of nastyness....however i have kept the best to last, and whip out my crack filled ryvitas....YUMMY! I head off to the gym to avoid greggs the bakers...as my stomach is seriously rumbling still.

So i arrive at the gym in a really good mood, smile at handsome guy, nod at huge lycra girl and say hello to strange staring woman....i must tell huge lycra girl that when she squats not only is it like the parting of the red sea, but her rather unpleasant underwear is too visible to be part of the genieva convension...hmmm maybe i tell her tomorrow, she is a big lass!!
So i jump on the spinning bike, well actually thats a lie, i struggle as usual onto the bike, those bikes are huge..and i am small, thought i was going to have a nose bleed on tuesday i was that high up, i look like an extra fromt he borrowers on it! just about to set of on a peddling frenzy when strange staring woman comes over and asks if i have had a nice day, so i chat for about thirty seconds to her, which was pleasant, but my god she needs to shave those legs, and maybe do something about her moustache...but she is pleasant enough, even if her eye contact was a bit full on....this is going to be a good day, and of i go.
After the work out, which i hasten to add leaves me in better condition than the jaunt up the stairs at work, i go to get changed...strange staring women follows me, in my cubicle i shower and get changed. i walk out to discover to my HORROR that SSW (strange staring woman as she will now be know) is there dressed from the waist down, but with her puppies unleashed and very in my face...i look away, but she decided now will be good time to engage me in conversation again ...god all i did was say hello ...that will teach me huh! ...so after a brief conversation about the fact i dont have a boyfriend...and a lot of me not looking at her rather saggy boobs...i leave...on the walk back to work i consider why women do the whole getting changed in the middle bit, when there are lots of empty cubicles, but like quantum physics...it is something i will never understand.

I arrive back at the office take the stairs again, and the office has filled up with flowers so it now looks like the chelsea flower shower...and i sit and listen to all the great things folk have planned and try and show a mild interest..knowing that for me it is home to my loved ones too.....RYVITA and a bit of my name is earl!!....dont get me wrong ...i think love is a great idea...just like human teleportation is a great idea..but both are a long way off for me!

Then i get a call from reception again that there is a letter for me to sign for...so i go back down the stairs, and pick up what feels like a card in an envelope...oooh exciting...now i am surely going to find out who sent the flowers....i go back up the stairs..and make it in one go this time lol...i feel around the envelope...oooh feels like one of those expensive padded cards...so i rip the envelope open...and out falls a ryvita with a compliments slip from the guys at the analsys lab...which is written rather shirtly i may add....saying, they are "sorry but they are unable to waste their time analysing what is in a ryvita but they are pretty confident crack cocaine is not one of the ingredients"....well i beg to differ my friends!!.....also they added a little threat at the end that if i try and waste tax payers money again with such requests that i will be disiplined...hmmm i didnt realise that a humour bypass was one of the things you needed to be an analyser...but i do now!!They can just wait until i send down my next cow brain stem....i am going to add a little something to it...ANALYSE THAT!!
So after pinning the compliments slip to the notice board, i get back to work...only to recieve another call to go to reception...and ohhh my GOD more flowers!!! no way..i look around to check their isnt a hidden camera!! i decide to take the lift this time, first time all week, but after last time, i am taking no chances.
So i am officially the only girl in the office to get 2 bunches of flowers wooohooo, i check my emails, to discover that my crazy ex has kindly reminded me that he loves me and that he is sad we cant be together today!! hmmm well maybe his chances would have been higher if her had not mentally and emotionally tortured me for 3 years, just a suggestion if you are reading this(you know who you are)!!
I didnt reply, and knew none of the flowers were from him, as he didnt even bother with a card when we were together, so i doubt he was likely to start now lol!!

I was in a meeting all afternoon so didnt get out of work until 4.20...so my flexi benefitted from today.I struggled back to the car with 2 bunches of flowers, one which was in a vase with water in it!! hmmm interesting i thought, how am i going to drive and not spill....so i had a cunning plan, phone big gay dave from work, and he came and carried it home for me...hurrah for being a spoilt princess lol!!.On way home i get a call from my other single friend, who suggests we do our usual valentine thing, and book a table at the posh resteraunt, and sit and taunt the sad couples who are clearly miserable, sitting across from each other like it is a prison visit!! but i decline as i am feeling a bit ill now....hmmmm lack of chocolate i think! It may be a medical thing, where i need to have chocolate every day...ahhh if only that illness existed!!
I get in and think i better be quick as it is nearly 5 ...and i cant eat after 5...but then i chuck up!! hmmm i reckon it was that salad....it def looked grim!!...so i am left kneeling over the toilet trying to work out how many calories i can knock off my daily tally, as most are now getting flushed away.
Calories 500 (roughly as not sure how many went down the pan)
Choc Fantasies 300
Bunches of flowers recieved 2
Odd looks from greesy guy 11
Flexi - up 53 minutes
Foliage eaten 0
Time on scales 23
Kisses 0